To Parents of Estranged Adult Children: No Contact Means No Contact

If you’ve been estranged by your adult child, I want you to grab a pen and underline this one in your heart:
Rule #1—No Contact Means No Contact.

In my book 'F*ck Them Kids', this is the first rule for a reason. It’s the hardest one. The most painful one. But also the most important one for your healing.

When your adult child declares "No contact," believe them. Respect it—not because you agree with it, not because it feels good—but because it's the first step in reclaiming your power.

So many parents get caught in the loop of trying to fix it, explain themselves, or chase after an adult child who has already made their decision. I get it. I did it too. But here's the truth that set me free:
When someone cuts you off, you don't chase. You walk away with your dignity intact.

No contact is not a negotiation. It's not an opening for you to prove you're worthy of love. It's their choice—and as painful as it is—you have the right (and the responsibility) to honor that choice by redirecting your energy back into yourself.

They say no contact?
Okay.
Then, you match that energy.

Matching energy is not bitterness—it's boundaries. It’s saying, "If you don’t want me in your life, I won’t force myself into it. And I certainly won’t sit here and beg for crumbs."

You see, when you respect no contact, you stop giving them the power to keep you dangling on a string. You step out of the game completely.

And here's the secret they don’t tell you:
The moment you stop chasing, begging, or explaining is the moment you start healing.

This isn’t about being cold-hearted. It’s about self-respect. It’s about protecting your peace. And it's about accepting that you can’t force someone to see your heart if they’ve already decided they don’t want to look.

So, Rule #1 stands firm:
No contact means no contact. Period.

Let them sit in the silence they created.
And you? You go live your life.